2012 came in with a bang. What will this year hold?
New Years has always been a time when I sit myself down and evaluate my life and where I want it to go. This is a time to reflect on the past and make a plan for the future. Typically I would sit down at the begining of the year and decide my race schedule and training periods. Now that I am not training any more I have different goals to set.
I continue to be content away from the running world. There are days that I miss my fitness and the camaraderie of a group to train with. I miss finishing a hard workout and feeling a great sense of accomplishment. I do not miss the total exhaustion that marked my life. I do not miss always being in pain. I really like trying to gain weight!
I always seem to set some of the same goals every year. The big thing I usually look for is a boyfriend. At 33 years old and yet to have a boyfriend I am thinking that 2012 may not be the year. I have dated and chased. I have added random people on Facebook and been asked to be set up with anyone that anyone knows. I have done electronic dating of all kinds. I have been shameless. I have also gotten involved in activities that are meaningful for me both gay and not gay. I have met thousands of people but not one single gay man who can tolerate me nor who I could have a relationship with. At the beginning of 2012 I am thinking that I will never fall in love and no one is going to fall in love with me. I am not setting any goals about meeting someone.
With regards to athletics my goals are solely superficial. I want to gain 10 to 15 pounds of muscle. This will be difficult as I have lost much of my appetite after years of training myself not to eat. I plan to hit the weight hard with some running to keep lean with a healthy heart.
Generally I want to have a happy and healthy 2012. I would like to get out more and party a bit more than I did last year. I am still learning what life is like away from training and running. I still forget sometimes that I can stay up late during the week and it will not destroy me for the week as when I was training. I want to maximize my potential in all areas of my life.
Lastly I would like to think of a new direction to take this blog. I started this blog because I did not see much about gays in sport on the web. Now that I am not competing maybe I can write about being a normal gay guy who has a type A personality. I will do some thinking.