Running is really hard.
This week I have noticed how much energy running takes and how much planning running requires.
For the last 6 months I have been basically doing whatever I want. I have become a yes man to most of what is offered without thinking much of time or energy. Now that I am training again I have suddenly realized my schedule is incredibly full and I am really tired. This is the kind of tired that permeates every cell in my body and gives my bed the voice of the sirens. He calls for me to get near and once firmly inside it will not let me go easily.
There is a lot of planning involved in a running schedule. Each day's workout has a purpose and builds on other work. Fatigue is a product of the training and is evidence of a program working. Eventually the body adapts to the strain placed upon it and we begin to get fit and run faster with less perceived effort. My fatigue shows me I am training and living hard, which is the point. I have to be willing to withstand this initial onslaught of exhaustion and push through it.
I am happy to be training again but I need to figure out how to balance training with life. I really like my life right now. Things are great in all areas of my life from work to recreation to dating (I am still single but dating...). I want to maintain this excitement and happiness with life and if I am tired all the time I will soon burn out again and forget why I do this. I can feel my self getting quiet and withdrawing. A few weeks ago I was craving to dance and party. Now I am content to sit quietly with friends and watch a movie. I am becoming a recluse again.
This is a hump to get over. This is the result of incredible drive and determination. I want to run fast. I want to win. I am willing to do what I must to win but I also want to have love, friends and fun outside of running. I will figure this out somehow!
Today was my first real day on the track and I felt like I have not been there in a while. Today was another lesson on how hard it is to run. It was a real and genuine struggle. At one point I had a very powerful realization of how well trained I was last year and how exceptional it is to be able to run without thinking twice about a 65 second 400. Generally I am pleased with my workout and there are a few lessons I have learned as well. I ran 10 times 400 with the help of some great teammates. John wanted me to run 70 down to 65. I ran what he asked. I ran 3 400's at around 70-72 and the rest mostly at 67 with a 65 thrown in to really fuck me up.
Lessons I have learned. Doing weights has changed how much my body can exercise without taking in energy. After my warm-up I was dizzy and starving. Half way through the workout I was forgetting what I was doing and could not remember what I was doing or what repetition I was on. I need to take energy to workouts now. I have also learned what it feels like to tie up. Holy Hannah my legs turned to jelly. I am still learning how hard it is to run.