When I have a bad race or generally feel sad I do two things. I go for a hard run and then I go shopping. It seems the more profound the sadness or disappointment the harder I run and the more expensive a store I need to remedy the situation. This morning I was working my own personal Prozac with a vengeance.
My long run this morning was 10 miles of hard running. I was almost at tempo pace for the duration of the run and I did not care. I ran hard on the soft surfaces and then would recover on the hard surfaces. When I hurt emotionally sometimes the hurt of training somehow makes things feel better all over. After my pathetic run yesterday I was ready to hurt a bit this morning. The biggest feeling I have now is that I wish I could run the race again.
After a quick lunch I hit the street to enjoy the wonderful sunny day and pick up a few groceries for dinner tonight. Somehow or other I found myself at Holt Renfrew. For some reason shopping makes me happy. Usually I can be satisfied with window shopping and trying on expensive clothes. With how my Autumn has been going I needed a purchase with the efficacy of Electro Convulsive Therapy (ECT). I was in Holt's and I happened across an amazing navy blue cashmere/alpaca cable knit Cardigan. This Cardigan even has real leather closures. A rush of excitement shook my body right down to my Blundstone Boots. This was the softest knit I have ever touched in my life. I found my size and checked the price, way too expensive. I walked around the store and found myself back at the sweater. The sales person (who was wearing the same sweater vest as I have, omen?) told me to try it on. I went to the change room with butterflies in my stomach thinking of what is going to happen when I tried it on. It fit like I was destined to find this sweater when I needed it most. A smile broke across my face and I realized that there was no way I was going to leave the store without this Cardigan sent straight from heaven. Being that I would like to travel to USA in the future I thought shop lifting would be a bad idea so I broke out the Visa and happily bought myself my second cashmere Christmas present for 2009.
The other big decision I have made about running is that I want to be the Johnny Weir of running. Any figure skating fans out there will know what I mean. In the spirit of Johnny I am on a search for my third and final Christmas present for myself, a new bag! I have been looking quite diligently and have yet to find what I am looking for. I would really like something leather but I fear that leather might be too gentle to throw a pair of muddy spikes into. I think I will hit main street in an attempt to find something that captures my heart and gives me butterflies. If no man can give me butterflies then at least I will have cashmere and a bag that make me happy. Long live commercialism!
Time to braise some brisket.